Sitting on the top of the hill in sunshine

Today,

I had a fight with kellie about georga, over nothing at the end of the day...

She wants to go home , I agreed that I would go home..

At the end of it neither of us went home...

Writing this reads silly, I'm sure we sounded stupid.

The girls went inside and I boarded by myself
-4
sunny,
with a wisp of snow,
no wind....
2pm....
It was a beautiful afternoon and I bust out in tears.
Un fucking controllable.......

So fuck up,
I can believe it,

I'm sure 10-20-30 years from now my kids are gonna read this and wonder where I was coming from..


Sitting in the snow, crying sobbing ,
I wanted to turn back time , and keep Hilton on life support,
the guilt over ran me today...
Why WHY the fuck...... Fuck I feel so guilty today.... Sitting in the snow...
I miss Hilton,

Goerg and kat wish everyone could be here on the mountain with us, hilton , ciaran ian and david........
-------------------------------
Son of a bitch...... MF'er

I so tired of not sleeping

I'm so tire of the waves of sadness,

I'm so fed up with feeling lonely

Or having flashes of hilton in the hospital..


Its been a little over 63 days since he died.....

Kellie says we have post traumatic stress disorder....


I'm sure she is right......


I went back to the condo,

Saw the girls, laid in my bed,

Georga has come into my room to make sure I'm ok...... Her and I made up this afternoon...
I love her so much , she a good girl...

We are going swiming...

Done....
Actually georg is nagging me to stop typing and come swimming