Monday, November 15, 2010

Hilton, monday morning 2am ish grieving

I'm at a loss for the sadness I'm feeling,

The waves of pain are nothing like I felt before in my life.

I at any moment can't catch my breath...

I can see him, At ever turn

I smell him,

Ever jeep I see....

I walk into my shop and he should be there...... I should see him...
in the morning I would walk by
And say...." Hilton everything OK" sipping my coffee....

He would nod... From a far...

I liked.. ,.. No.... I loved him working with me.....

I could bark orders and he got it,

We were at a point at work where as I could say a half sentence and he got it before I had finished....

He was almost done getting the stock room set up...

And the shop was spotless

He was strong , smart fast on his feet, took on everything in front of him...

Especially this last year, it all clicked, he got it... This year was the year he bought his first car
saved 8.000 ++ for a house...
He had his act together......
he loved his job...
He had a great girlfriend

He was a great snowboarder, long boarder,

He wasn't hook on any bad shit ,
Was a real GOOD. BOY.... What am I saying he was a good MAN.....


And now he is GONE.......


So sad, it makes my throat close in... And can't swallow..... There is no reason, he, he..... should be gone.....?

Fuck me.........
-------------------------------

Deep deep breath...

Good night, good bless

And don't let the bed bugs bite......

-------------------------------

I promise hilton that I will grow from this, and be strong and live life.. Make sure kat and georg are taken care of.... We had conversations about making sure kat and georg were taking care of.... Schools, homes... Life stuff...

It was always with the intention of me kicking the bucket......... Not him... So now that I'm here.... I'm gonna make him proud.... Run the compaby bigger and better, help the girls... Go as far as they can go...cause that what he and I would shoot the shit about... How he would take over and help the family...

So hilton kat , georga and kellie are kick some life ass for you....

1 comment:

  1. i love you, hilt. whatever we do is done x10 because that's how he'd do it!

    ReplyDelete